no.friends.

How in gods name can people have so many friends listed on facebook? Of my 23 facebook friends, about half of them have a reasonable number (between 20 and 50 or so). The other half claims to have hundreds of friends. The top number? 962. Seriously? There's no way these people really know everyone they claim to. Is there some secret link you click on to artificially increase your numbers? Am i missing out on something here?

out.of.my.hands-almost.

I was up until 4am last night (this morning) working on my application essay. I haven't mentioned the whole thing in my blog because it's been stressing me out. Even with everything pretty much finished, i'm still reluctant to go through with it. Reluctant isn't the right word though- i'm definitely finishing everything up, and will drop it off tomorrow, but this is something that i would usually have done a month ago. The only thing that i can think of that would explain my procrastination is the worry that i might not get in. I want this so badly, and even though everything will work out regardless of where i am, i want to be in boston. I haven't even looked into the program in new york to which i'm applying- it's my backup, backup plan in case all else goes south. In any case, i have in my lap a manila folder that contains everything left to complete my application- my essay, resume, volunteer hour certification form and reference from a. She wrote me a fantastic letter (she let me read it) and even if i don't get in, it made me happy to read it. They already have my other two references and transcripts, so after dropping this puppy off tomorrow, all i'll have left to do is wait. Oh, and figure out what i have to send to that school in new york.

no.smoking.

Since none of you stepped up, i brought e. as my date to the blood donor appreciation dinner tonight. She was a great date. We sat at a table with two little boys- the only other kids there- and she was thoroughly entertained. They were actually guests, and their dad was one of the guest speakers. The older boy (who's 4) had cancer, and was inpatient for 7 months from january through august of last year. He's in complete remission now, and looks like a healthy kid. While his dad was giving his talk, they showed a slide show of pictures of him during his treatment. E., who'd just spent a few hours playing with him, was very concerned about his tubes and lack of hair in the pictures. She asked how he got cancer since he's too little to smoke. I guess we've really pushed the smoking=cancer issue.

blue.hills.

I went hiking yesterday with two pirates- l. and e. They were great hikers, and e. in particular had really improved from last time. Her short little legs carried her just about as fast as my long ones, and she scampered over rocks with her sister quite well. L.'s freaking amazing, and started by sprinting up the initial steep, rocky section. It's a good darn thing that i had e. with me, or it could have been very embarrassing. I love that they love doing this stuff too. I know they'll be big fans of camping if they're ever allowed to come with me (though i'm not expecting hell to freeze over anytime soon). In the meantime, i'll be happy with this.

in.case.you.were.wondering.

Do you sneeze in your sleep?

I've always been curious about this. It seems like you would wake yourself up if this was the case, but who knows. Here's the research:

"Sneezing is a reflex to odorants in the nasal cavity-- meaning that it's an uncontrollable physical response to an outside stimulus. When an odorant stimulates nerve endings in the epithelial lining of the nasal cavity, the stimulus travels to the CNS (central nervous system) and is then sent back to the muscles of the face, throat and chest via the ventral ganglia/spinal motor nerves. So basically when stimulated, the muscles go to work and cause us to expel air from the mouth and nose--aka, a sneeze. Since the nasal epithelium swells when we lie down, it's much more sensitive to a sneeze. It's intuitive to think that this would seem that sneezing would be more likely during sleep. There is a big but though...Since there isn't much airflow in most bedrooms at night, and very little movement to stir up dust and other particles, the nose does not come into contact with as many odorants as it does during the day. Additionally, the area of the brain responsible for the reflexive actions is relaxed while asleep. So, even when a particle does touch the nasal epithelium, the brain doesn't notice, and we don't sneeze."

I think some people do sneeze while asleep, but it's not that common for the reasons given above. I buy it. My room's like a cave at night- no airflow at all!

easter.

I got to bring the girls with me to my parents' house for easter dinner. It's a long story, so here's the short version:
They were in colorado skiing for a week, during which they had most of the floors sanded and stained in their house. I picked them up at the airport at 5:15 am on easter morning. We all went back to sleep until 10, and then started moving massive quantities of furniture back where they belonged. They decided not to drive to nh for the family easter celebration for several reasons, so i volunteered to take the girls along with me.
They were very well behaved, and i was proud. After eating a good meal, they cleared the dishes, and m. washed, dried and put away all the silver without being asked. This job usually falls on kevin and me, so we were extra excited. I can see the benefit of having kids around. They were thoroughly entertained by my cousin katherine (who was viewed as the super cool 24 yr old) and my brother kevin (who bore the brunt of their craziness). They also helped me search for my easter basket which the easter bunny hides every year. This was the only tricky part of the day. Kevin is the youngest kid around our house, and he's 21. It's therefore been years since we've believed in a certain long eared fuzzy friend, and everyone had gotten sloppy about how they talked of him. There were several slips that were hopefully covered up quick enough, though i wouldn't bet on it. Hopefully they won't remember this as the easter they stopped believing!!

in.case.you.were.wondering.

Double-u vs. double-v.

In the french alphabet, w is pronounced "double v". This seems appropriate since the w looks more like vv than uu. I've always wished we could fix it in the english language, but first decided to look up the reason why we say double-u. Here's what i found:

“English uses the Latin alphabet of the Romans. However, this had no letter suitable for representing the phoneme /w/ which was used in Old English, though phonetically the sound represented by /v/ was quite close. In the 7th century scribes wrote uu for /w/; later they used the runic symbols known as wynn. European scribes had continued to write uu, and this usage returned to England with the Norman Conquest in 1066. Early printers sometimes used vv for lack of a w in their type. The name double-u recalls the former identity of u and v, which is also evident in a number of cognate words (flour/flower, guard/ward, suede/Swede, etc.).”

I suppose it makes sense.

ruff.

Last night i met up with mandy and a bunch of other friends for dinner at OM in harvard square. Here's a picture of all the girls...


I decided to try street parking before the valet, and due to construction in the center, ended up a good ways down mass ave (about 3/4 mile according to mapmyrun). I did get a spot, and got a nice walk in before sitting down to eat for several hours. On my way past cambridge commons, i noticed a dog running large, fast ovals around his owner. It was 8pm- so dark- and i couldn't figure out how he was staying in such a consistent loop without a leash. It looked like the guy was holding a flashlight, but he wasn't. It was a laser, and the dog was chasing the beam. Pretty smart, or pretty lazy. The dog looked like he had a boatload of energy, so it was definitely an efficient way to use some of it up.

toxic.

I've been staying at the b's house since monday. They're off skiing for the week, and since i'm using their cars anyway (while mine's in the shop), i figured it's easier to leave them in their driveway rather than park them on my street. Plus, it's really nice to have the whole place to myself. It's the perfect environment to finish up my application essay, which is coming along quite nicely (in my head at least- i've yet to start typing it). I even have a new best friend! Arthur is here during the day with his son, and they're refinishing the floors on the first and second floor. I only see them briefly in the morning, but it brightens my day! If this guy was 30 years younger, i'd marry him myself. The only potentially negative side effect, is the smell. The stain and sealant make the place stink to high heavens! I keep my bedroom door shut with a window cracked during the day which seems to do the trick. I don't notice it much anymore. I'm not sure if that's because they're finishing up, or because enough sensory brain cells have died off. Every so often, i get a taste of it from the nalgene bottle i bring everywhere. It must have absorbed the odor. I don't think this could be seen as good in any light.

happy.birthday.

Happy birthday tishka! I don't know that you read my blog regularly, but i figured it was worth the shout out. I hope you ate some cake and opened lots of presents today!

egg.hunt!

Today i got to help with the big egg hunt in the ulfeder healing garden at mgh. The child life specialist at my monday volunteer clinic organizes this every year, and a ton of kids from the pedi hem-onc clinic come, along with some from spaulding and the pedi inpatient floors. It was a blast. The ulfeder garden is amazing- a rooftop garden that's so peaceful even though it's high up in the city. We hid over 400 eggs, and then set up tables with cupcakes, pretzels, popcorn, chocolate milk (in cartons!), etc in the waiting room. The music therapy woman came and sang bunny songs while we waited for all the kids to arrive, and then we got a visit from the easter bunny himself! I was in charge of taking pictures, and i caught many happy smiles from many happy children.

jetta.

My car's in the shop again. It desperately needed a tune up, and along with that (apparently), a new alternator and entire exhaust system. While i wasn't expecting those specific issues, they do make sense, and explain most of the issues i've been having with my car, including the reluctance to start in the morning and the hot, fiery smell i sometimes notice. The alternator's also a whole heck of a lot less expensive than replacing the ignition coil or clutch- the two things i thought might be an issue. As for the exhaust system, apparently it's rotting. Yup- rotting. It didn't sound as strange to me as it might have because tishka had the exact same issue with her vw five years ago. The mechanic told her she wasn't driving it enough, especially for long distances. Everytime she drove it short distances, condensation built up, but wasn't expelled as it would have been had she kept driving. The good news is that i no longer bring it to the dealership since i've found a good guy i trust. Still, this is (i think) the most expensive trip yet for my car. I can only imagine how much more it would be at the dealership. Yikes!

i.win!!

Remember last august when i sliced open my thumb? If so, then you'll also recall that i went to two hospitals since i got tired of sitting at the first one after 5 hours. Sometime in november or december, i received two bills- one from beth isreal (who actually sewed up my finger), and one from the other hospital (which didn't do anything). I paid the $50 to beth isreal right away, but was overly annoyed with the other place. They did nothing but leave me sitting in the waiting room with no staff members until 2:30am, but still decided to charge my insurance company for something and charge me the $50 copay. I was livid. I called the accounts department to get the scoop, and the (very nice) woman told me that the charge was because i'd seen the triage nurse (who took my temp, blood pressure, etc). I politely expressed my annoyance, and agreeing with me, she suggested that i write a letter disputing the charge, and gave me a name and address to send it to. I almost didn't do this- et#1 scared me with stories of bad credit due to disputed medical claims, and after all...it was just $50. I actually wrote the check out, and was ready to mail it when my annoyance got the better of me. I sat in that waiting room for five hours with no update from anyone. If there had been even one employee there after 1am to check in with, i wouldn't have had a problem paying it. $50 may not be a ton of money, but i could think of many things i'd rather get with it. I wrote the letter, ccing my insurance company, and mailed that out instead. It recently occurred to me that i never heard back, and after checking the mail at my parents house (i still get some there though i haven't lived there for over 10 years), i got nervous about being sent to collections for $50. I finally called today, and i have an account balance of $0! I won! Now i have $50 extra to invest- i could buy 25 shares of bear stearns!!

experiment.

The 4 and 7 year old kids did an experiment tonight. Apparently they do this quite frequently, but i've never actually witnessed it. The gist is this- they request certain ingredients, mix them all together, dump the product on a cookie sheet, and cook it for a bit. Surprisingly, they usually come up with a halfway decent result. Here's what they put in tonight: (and all measurements are approximate since they did this themselves.)
2 eggs
1 T melted butter
2/3 cup milk
1 t vanilla
2 cups flour
1/3 cup sugar
1/4 t baking powder
1/2 cup chocolate chips
We greased the cookie sheet, stretched the dough out, and cooked it at 350 for about 25 mins. It was interesting- kind of a mix between dense bread and a cookie. Pretty tasty, actually. I guess they came up with something once that was a lot better, and tasted like cinnamon bread. It cracks me up that these two little kids pay enough attention to their mom that they can round up a sensible list of ingredients by themselves, and use reasonable measurements. Maybe we should start keeping track of their recipes, and put a book out with the best stuff. It could be a real money maker!

la.belle.france.

I want a portable gps. We brought jen's when i drove up to nh for a baptism, and she changed the british voice to french. It was so fun! I got to practice my french the entire way home!
"Sortie a droite, puis, sortie a gauche."
"Dans huit pointe deux milles, sortie a droite."
The interesting thing was that it used sortie (which means output, exit, leave, etc) instead of tournez (turn). Makes sense when you're talking about exits on a highway, but not so much with regular turns on the street. I'd really like to beef up my french again. I've always wished i'd done a semester abroad over there to really become fluent. Maybe if i don't get into any grad programs for next fall, i'll move to france for a year. That'd do the trick!

denial.

I've always had a hard time accepting dying and death. Even when it's a fairly certain thing, i still practice denial. Not consciously though. Consciously, i try to prepare myself for the inevitable. I see and hear what's happening, and work at convincing that other part of me that there's a chance, a likelihood, that this person will die. I never quite get to that point though, and when the reality of death smacks me in the face, i feel like something has failed me.
In the past, this has only been a problem. When loved ones have died, i've never quite accepted it, and can't connect my life that they were a part of, to my life that they're not here for. While i'm sure this is something i'll (unfortunately) become more familiar with, i don't know how much easier it will become. What i have found, is that this denial to accept reality can be useful.
I'm loving my two volunteer days at mgh. Loving them. Today in particular was a day i felt like i was so perfect for this job, even just the basic volunteer aspects. I knew that the days of the children i spent time with, along with their parents, were made a little bit easier by my being there. Right before i started my volunteer hours, i was so worried about my ability to spend time with and comfort children who were sick- some terminally. I mentioned my doubts to a., who immediately assured me that i would be fine- that i'd treat these kids just as i'd treat m. or l. or e., like normal kids. That was enough to calm me down and get me in there, and it turned out she was right. I know that most of the kids i've met will be fine. They'll get through their illness, go home, and live normal lives. I also know that some kids will not. They'll suffer through treatment after treatment, and eventually die. Consciously i know this, but luckily, i don't believe it. I still expect some miracle to occur, because no child i know could actually be allowed to die. This denial is what allows me to treat them as normal kids, which is exactly what they want.

like.dislike.

I like:
- the smell of baby dolls (like cabbage patch babies) that have that special powder scent to them. It takes me back to my early years when all i had to worry about was which outfit to dress them in.

I dislike:
-kathy griffin. Not really a something, but a someone. Her sense of humor makes me irrationally angry, almost as much as her voice. It's beyond me why anyone finds her amusing.

excuse.me?

Said by 4 yr old c. in reference to the motorcycle ramp that needed some tools to put together:

"Does anybody know how to screw?"

my.dream.on.sunday.

Here's the dream that my alarm woke me from on sunday morning.
I was watching a baby/toddler at his condo, and realized just as the mom came home that i hadn't changed his diaper for the entire day (like 9 hours). I tried desperately to come up with a reason to change it without it looking suspicious. Luckily, she saved me by asking me to change him and put him in front of cable while she finished up a phone call. This was good, except for i didn't know where his room or diaper table was since i hadn't changed him all day. I couldn't ask, and the kid wasn't old enough to tell me, so i went searching. That's when i realized that the first floor of the condo was part of an office building, and there was no separation between the two. I passed the men's and women's room, and then realized that his room must be on the second floor. I walked back to the living room at which point l. showed up. I'm not sure what she was doing there, but i went along with it. We found the escalator, and started up to the second floor. I had the kid piggy back, and l. was in front of me. The escalator was pretty high, and there were large white geometric shapes hanging from the ceiling near us as decorations. All of a sudden, l. hops up on the railing, and jumps onto one of the shapes as quick as a fox. I freaked out, and yelled to her to come back. She was just skipping around on them, not worried at all, and said it was fun. Then the shapes started wiggling, and she got nervous. I kept trying to get her to come back, and eventually she jumped into the water (an ocean had mysteriously appeared along side the escalator by this point). The current was very strong, and waves kept pushing her away, but she managed to get close enough to grab one of my fingers. I pulled her in, safe and sound, and then my alarm went off. Disturbing.

thank.goodness.for.cell.phones.

Sunday was a busy day. Church (because m. was doing the first reading), painting, boston youth symphony orchestra and dinner at the elephant walk. I went to bed somewhat late on saturday- a little after midnight perhaps- and set my alarm for 8am in order to be ready to leave by 8:30. The alarm woke me up in the middle of a disturbing dream, so at first i thought my grogginess was due to that interruption. It took me about five minutes to remember daylight savings time, something the cell phone network took care of for me. If it weren't for my phone alarm, my entire day could have been a wash!

classic.e.

I bought some new frames to hang on my wall of frames, and had to find a few b+w photos to fill them temporarily. I was worried i wouldn't find anything since most of my proofs and contact sheets are still in my darkroom at the b.'s house, but i was in luck! I dug through a box i keep on my shelf, and hit the mother load. This was probably the best one i came across...


It's e. when she was a little baby. (I won't black out her face since she looks completely different now, and it would defeat the purpose of posting the picture here.) It's 6"x9", so too big to put in one of my new frames, but i think i'll have to find a spot for it. Seriously- how hilarious is this? She looks so worried! There's even a little bubble of drool on her lower lip. Priceless.

choo.choo.

I was hanging out with the belmont kids the other night, and when we were reading before bed, i looked up and saw an obama poster on the 7 year old's wall. Sure enough, all four of them (aged 4, 5, 7, and 9) were obama supporters. It made me think of evil, and his overwhelming support for obama. Apparently, even kids can ride the train!

it's.my.brother's.birthday!

He's twenty-eight. Say:

happy birthday brian!!

Last year he kept forgetting it was his birthday- hope you didn't forget about it this year!

in.like.a.lion.

The plan was to go hiking. At least, that was the plan a few days ago. When it came down to it, the weather didn't cooperate, so we decided to go to target first and see if things shaped up. Once we finished at target, homegoods was right next door, so we poked in to see if there was anything of interest. Turns out there was. This fantastic sculpture andrea noticed in the sculpture section made for a good laugh. I took a picture with my phone, and actually managed to get it onto my computer. Sure, it's the size of a postage stamp, but if you look very carefully (possibly with a magnifying glass), you'll understand why we were so amused:

It's a statue of a golden foot being tickled with a feather by a golden hand. The best part's that the hand, foot and base are made of very heavy, solid material, and the feather's an actual feather- not a golden cast feather. Apparently nora almost choked on her gum when she saw it.
After leaving that store (with no purchases), we walked across the street to dsw and marshalls. We all got a pair of clearance shoes at dsw (mine are shiny blue!), and some gym clothes at marshalls- the theory being that buying new gym gear will motivate us to go to the gym. Despite not hiking, we got in lots of exercise. Both nora and i went to our gyms this morning while andrea trekked down to haymarket with et#1, and we must have walked miles and miles up and down aisles on our shopping trip. Also- the squats we got in while trying on many pairs of shoes will help tighten our glutes.