optic.nerve.

*ja* and I still managed to get out on our walk tonight even though it was sub-zero with the wind chill. Very nippy. We only did two miles instead of our usual four in order to save our extremities from frostbite. Afterwards, we were eating dinner and watching an old episode of malcolm in the middle. It was one where lois is trying to get dewey's ratty old teddy (domingo)away from him, and he won't give it up. She grabbed it from him, but he snuck it back. Here's a transcript of what happened next.

(Lois walks into dewey's room sniffing the air. Dewey's in bed.) (*If you've seen this show, try to hear this with lois and dewey's voices. It makes it much funnier.)
Lois: "Okay. Where's domingo. Come on, I can smell him. (pause) Honey, do you think I just took domingo away from you because I'm mean?"
Dewey: "Absolutely."
Lois: "Dewey. The reason I had to take your teddy bear away is because he's very dirty. He's covered with germs and he could make you very sick."
Dewey: "He wouldn't do that. He loves me."
Lois: "It's the germs sweety. They're tiny bugs carrying disease, and domingo is covered with them. Now when you touch them, they get on your hands, and what do you suppose happens if you touch your eyes? Well I'll tell you what happens. The germs get in there and they infect them, and you get very sick, and eventually your optic nerve rots away and your eyes fall out. Now, if you want to keep domingo, you can. But if you want to keep your eyes, you'll give domingo to me."
(Dewey whips the bear out from under his covers and hands him over to lois.)
Lois: "You made the smart choice sweety. Sleep tight."
(The rest of the episode shows dewey wearing gas masks, wrapping himself in saran wrap with a bug net over his head, and cleaning everything in the house from top to bottom. Lois eventually puts an end to it by eating a bug that dewey was scared of.)

So, *ja* was drinking water at the exact point where lois talks about the optic nerve rotting and the eyes falling out. She started to laugh, and shot water up her nose and all over the place. It was hilarious! So funny, in fact, that I just had to write it up here.